Here is our objective evaluation of two major icons: Jack Klugman and William Shatner. Please feel free to take notes.
Starship captaincy:
Shatner: 79 episodes of Star Trek, plus seven movies
Klugman: "Death Ship" in The Twilight Zone
Winner: Shatner, but only by a technicality
Positive Image of Law Enforcement
Shatner: TJ Hooker, playing a cop
Klugman: Quincy, playing a medical examiner 20 years before CSI
Winner: Klugman
Twilight Zone appearances:
Shatner - 2 (Nick of Time, Nightmare at 20,000 Feet)
Klugman - 4 (A Passage For Trumpet, A Game of Pool, Death Ship, In Praise of Pip).
Winner - Klugman
Sidekick
Shatner - Leonard Nimoy, annoying dude
Klugman - Tony Randall, not-so-annoying dude
Winner - Klugman
Head covering
Shatner - bad toupee
Klugman - hat
Winner - Klugman
Smells like:
Shatner - "lamb sausage" (according to James Spader)
Klugman - steak and bourbon, with a slight hint of Aqua Velva
Winner - Klugman
So, for all of you Shatner fans, although we admire his work, let's face it - he's no Jack Klugman.
Now go deal. Seriously.
Friday, September 16, 2005
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2 comments:
And Jack STILL has more Emmys.
Plus, Klugman is all-American.
Shatner's a Canadian.
You make the call
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